:: Sunday, September 15, 2002 ::

"In the blur of serenity, where did everything get lost?" (Nine Inch Nails)

I visited a new church today... *sigh*
Pastor asking in a solemn voice, "Is the kingdom of God better because you're in it? What kind of witness are you being? Which Jesus are you following -- the real one, or the one you've created?" I get the impression we are all supposed to feel ashamed, flooded with conviction over our requisite lukewarmness. Pastor continues, "I know these are tough questions, but Jesus wouldn't ask you any easier ones. Are you enhancing the kingdom or inhibiting it? Take a look inside, and I think you'll find the answer. ::shakes head sadly::"
So now I feel guilty for not feeling guilty. I know how deeply I love God. I know how I try to live every moment for Him. I know I haven't reached the nirvana-land of perfect Christianity, but I'm doing my best. Should I still feel convicted when the pastor "tsk-tsk"s?
One thing that bothers me is the way so many pastors preach time and time again on how you can't be lukewarm, how you can't give God only part of yourself, how you should have led more people to Christ, etc, etc, ad nauseum. Apologies for the psych talk, but I think preaching about that keeps the congregation at that place of uncertainty.
What if pastors quit making people doubt their own faith? What if sermons were meat rather than skim milk? What if people were learning about God's heart rather than their own failings? What if they were discovering ways to live their beliefs rather than wallowing in doubtful guilt? What if pastors would lead their congregations somewhere rather than pinning them into weak Christianity?
So many church members, looking up at the Reverend General with gullibility in their eyes, thinking, "Oh yes, I must be lukewarm, oh yes, I guess I probably made up my own Jesus too. God, help me not do that anymore." At least not until the next sermon.
Focusing on the negative is the worst way to reach the positive. Looking down never helped anyone climb upward. Why should we search inside ourselves for the solution to things far beyond us? Why should we focus on ourselves, our actions, our shortcomings? How will that help us live for God? Hebrews 12 says something, if I recall, about "looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith."
Please, pastors, don't try to keep us as infant Christians, so convinced of our inabilities that we can't grow. Help us focus instead on God, pushing onward, refusing to look back and wallow in the ways we didn't measure up.
Oh heavens. Can I not just listen to a sermon without arguing?

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:: Bethany Bassett - 2:39 PM :: + ::